the Glass Child - I found this creature on the tube one morning....
I found this creature on the tube one morning. We’re best friends now.  Anyway… I woke up the 1st of January, determined to make this year count. I don’t know if you’ve ever been there, when you just kind of hit a wall and suddenly realize that “this is my life, happening right now, and I will never be this young again.” I hit that wall, and I made a promise to myself to live this year as if I’ll never be 20 years old again. So every day I’ve been capturing every single second, making sure that nothing is slipping away.  I’ve been spending my days writing, recording, producing. I’ve been traveling to known and unknown places, I’ve been reading more books than ever, listened to new music and seen more movies than ever before. I’ve been feeding myself with new thoughts, views, feelings and realizations. I’ve spent more time with old friends and I’ve pushed myself outside my comfort-zone by talking to people I don’t know, to learn how to deal with new situations and myself.  I often get emails and messages from you saying that I seem so strong and sure. Well, yeah when it comes to my music I’m completely sure and determined about what I want, because that’s the only place I feel safe in. But when it comes to who I am outside that, when it comes to how to live my life, I’m still pretty lost. But what I’m slowly learning is that that’s okay. It’s okay to not know what you want to get out of this life, as long as you keep searching for it. It’s about understanding your nature, and relearn it every single day.  I hope you never stop searching, and I hope you will never sit down and say “I know myself and I’m sure about everything there is about me.” I hope you will always feel a little lost, confused and overwhelmed, because that’s where you learn things.  For a while, I thought I was done with London. I even hated it, because it killed my dream over and over again. But I’m learning that that’s the reason to why I love this city. It makes me work harder, want more, feel more and get overwhelmed every single day.  I reject sanity and calmness. It’s the storm that I believe in. 

I found this creature on the tube one morning. We’re best friends now. 

Anyway… I woke up the 1st of January, determined to make this year count. I don’t know if you’ve ever been there, when you just kind of hit a wall and suddenly realize that “this is my life, happening right now, and I will never be this young again.” I hit that wall, and I made a promise to myself to live this year as if I’ll never be 20 years old again. So every day I’ve been capturing every single second, making sure that nothing is slipping away. 

I’ve been spending my days writing, recording, producing. I’ve been traveling to known and unknown places, I’ve been reading more books than ever, listened to new music and seen more movies than ever before. I’ve been feeding myself with new thoughts, views, feelings and realizations. I’ve spent more time with old friends and I’ve pushed myself outside my comfort-zone by talking to people I don’t know, to learn how to deal with new situations and myself. 

I often get emails and messages from you saying that I seem so strong and sure. Well, yeah when it comes to my music I’m completely sure and determined about what I want, because that’s the only place I feel safe in. But when it comes to who I am outside that, when it comes to how to live my life, I’m still pretty lost. But what I’m slowly learning is that that’s okay. It’s okay to not know what you want to get out of this life, as long as you keep searching for it. It’s about understanding your nature, and relearn it every single day. 

I hope you never stop searching, and I hope you will never sit down and say “I know myself and I’m sure about everything there is about me.” I hope you will always feel a little lost, confused and overwhelmed, because that’s where you learn things. 

For a while, I thought I was done with London. I even hated it, because it killed my dream over and over again. But I’m learning that that’s the reason to why I love this city. It makes me work harder, want more, feel more and get overwhelmed every single day. 

I reject sanity and calmness. It’s the storm that I believe in. 

Jan 16 2012

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